Fear

Jul
07
2016

Happy Birthday,  America!

For those of us living in the States, we are blessed to be born in a place where freedom, liberty and justice for all, reigns. Often our freedom to make choices is often constrained by our limited thinking. To know that one has the power to choose to do, be and create whatever they want is a power often abused or ignored, mainly because it appears as free. Our freedom is all part of the beauty that our founding fathers had the courage to create with walking away from an oppressive government to create a life and pursuit of happiness in a new Union, better known as the United States of America.

Therefore, we owe our freedom to our forefathers and those brave enough to protect our country’s freedom. Our freedom is a gift and comes with the challenge to embrace your freedom and make choices that align with solid core values, such as integrity, respect, trust, honesty, kindness, generosity….

The most powerful human ability is the ability to make choices. Every moment of every day we make choices. From the time we awake in the morning, the clothes we wear to the decisions at work, home, career and finances, all leads to a road of well-being. In turn, you can choose to be busy, you can choose to be stressed, you can choose your own happiness and joy, it’s genuinely up to you. No one has the power over your own happiness, as you hold the key.

According to Webster’s dictionary freedom is defined as; ” the absence of constraint of choice. “

In essence, most focus on what is limiting them, most focus on , what is in the way, what is lacking, what is not working ? How about what is working, what are you grateful for and what are the solutions available if we choose to look beyond the scarcity of our own thoughts and fears?

You see you do have the freedom to choose beyond what society would mold you to believe and begin to choose at any moment what freedom means to you: The freedom to choose…

  • to leave an abusive relationship
  • to say I love you
  • to start opening your heart and dating again
  • to create that new business
  • to write that book
  • to lose the weight
  • to stand up for yourself
  • to get divorced
  • to start a new career
  • to ditch the self- limiting thoughts
  • to stop staying in victim mode
  • to begin a new chapter of your life
  • to take a class
  • to volunteer
  • to overcome fear
  • to make new friends

It is up to us to make this country great! And to do so, you must live in your greatness and choose your highest potential, this takes action, ladies and gentlemen. Live your life by generating your own freedom and start making courageous choices. To honor this life you are honoring those who sacrificed their own lives so you could have the opportunity to shine and pursue your happiness and fulfill your potential.

It is time to make choices toward positive change and live in freedom where the action you take makes an impact and ripple effect to cause celebration to be alive!

You are supported in loved in your choices and we welcome you to be BOLD, BE BRAVE and BE YOU!

 

Cheers to your happiness,

Jackie

 

P.S. I invite you to join me this summer for a soulful program to form your dream with a plan and end the year strong, by choosing to take charge of your passion and placing it into purpose to thrive. We welcome you to start your new growth journey in the Happiness Warrior’s Way 24 week Aspiring Entrepreneur Program for Women to profit from your purpose with passion! All the details are here and we have 12 spots open. Take a peek and Apply here.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Apr
04
2014

Okay, I hear you about ” living on the edge” and requiring ways in which to banish those underlying fears ; dying alone and having no retirement, I  get it! We have all been there and back and there again. Welcome to the 21st Century of living life in a complex world! The number one reason why I wrote my book is because so many  of us driving the freeways, working hard and handling the ups, downs, divorce, sleep problems, stress at work, the list goes on and on.  I have heard it all,  and YOU are not alone! The book is your handy companion to rapidly banish your fears, overcome obstacles and gain the coping mechanisms to get happy , feel alive and feel good about who you are and why you are here to live a meaningful life!

You may have read in many books, articles , tweets, that fear is an illusion. And our thoughts  shape our reality. Well, this is both true and false. When you think into the future and it looks bleak to you, chances are you are living in fear. The more you think into the future in a negative way, the more fear you will feel, to the point where it becomes an illusion. This is unhealthy and not living up to your full potential.

Coping mechanism # 1:  Stop. Clear the ego of self-limiting beliefs and get clear on what you can do right NOW. Focus on two tasks in the now and I promise you will feel better and less stressed.

You may have warranted reasons behind your fear, and it is natural for all of us to feel fear in scary times with not knowing what our mortality will look like?

Coping mechanism # 2: Your health is your wealth. Take care of Y-O-U, first and foremost. Starting your day with a positive thought, knowing your miracle is right around the corner certainly can help, however, the best approach is to call in the big guns! Those who have been there done that are your trusted advisors or soon to be.

Coping mechanism # 3: Ask for help! The sign of a leader is someone who knows how to reach out and ask for help. There is nothing to be ashamed of when asking for help, we are all people here to help each other in some way or form. Someone out there loves you , cares about you and wants to see you happy and successful. In fact, you already are, you just need a reminder.

Fear can stem from a false belief of success or failure and whatever belief you may hold about this can define you to a point where you only  perceive  your shortcomings. Fear is like the little devil on your shoulder telling you, ” No, you can’t do that, who do you think you are?” Squash that little devil and look at your obstacles as a place to stretch and grow beyond your comfort level. Whatever your circumstances, do not allow it to create a poor decision instead,  make a decision that will have a positive lasting effect and not a short term solution that you may regret later. In other words, don’t throw the baby out with the bath water. Stay the course, keep your vision and whatever set back may appear represents you being on the right path with knowing and seeing your vision manifestWellness into reality. Mistakes and failures mean you are trying instead of doing nothing at all. Coping mechanism #4; Refuse to feel stressed and say a mantra such as I am successful in all that I do and I trust everything will work out for the best. Replacing a negative thought with a positive thought will get you much closer to banishing your fears.

Coping mechanism #5: How you change your life around is a feat in  being proactive and not reactive. Write down your fear(s) and place some scenarios or solutions around it, think out of the box. Change is inherent part of life and the sooner we accept change the sooner we will get moving . So get moving and I will see you on the other side of the bridge to happiness and success!

QUOTE: You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the thing you think you cannot do.  Eleanor Roosevelt

Stress reliever tool:  Have you tried calm.com ? This is a great tool to relax the mind and the body, at work, home or on the go. 

What do you do to handle fear and what are your best practices for coping mechanisms, let us know in the comments section?

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“America’s Happyologist” Jackie Ruka is a lifestyle expert who founded the Get Happy Zone (www.gethappyzone.com) personal development organization.  She is also the author of the action guide, “Get Happy and Create a Kick Butt Life, a Toolbox for Rapidly Activating the Life You Desire.” Contact Jackie and take her Fearless Quiz online at www.tinyurl.com/HappinessQuiz. and receive a free report for Top 10 Ways to be Happy and Successful in a Complex World.

 

ORDER your copy NOW and receive 2 Free tools TODAY: ORDER

 
 

 

 

 

 

Jun
06
2013

happier lifeThe Economics of Your Self Worth

These days, it is hard not to focus our attention on the need for money and the perceived lack of opportunity to improve our situations. Will I make enough money to go on vacation, to support my family, or even to send my children to school? These issues are relevant to most Americans’ lives, yet most also do not realize that they may be focusing on the wrong questions. What we need now is a change of mindset, so we can stop thinking of money as the ultimate product of our hard work. We must instead focus on owning our personal development and self worth in order to achieve true satisfaction in our lives. Point being, you are ENOUGH, in spite of an economic downturn. So the question remains, what does your self worth mean to you exactly? To me it means unlearning what is stopping me and waking up to what I can create in my life with meaning, integrity and fulfillment toward helping others with my gifts and abilities. Are you doing this now or is something missing in this area of your personal development?

If you don’t respect yourself, how do you expect others to respect you? If you know you are better than purpose you are doing now, what’s stopping you from making a change? Be the boss of your own life! We have become so good at making excuses: there are no opportunities; I don’t have time to look for a new job; I’m getting by with what I’m doing now. Many of us would not like to admit that money is an issue and therefore a priority in our lives. If money is an issue in your life, what’s stopping your from making a change for the better?

Changing yourself is the first step to your own success. It takes time and considerable patience, but it WILL pay off (literally), and it will make you more satisfied with yourself and your life. Stop asking yourself why something isn’t going the way you want it to, and start asking yourself what you can do or change to get to where you want to be. Take control, make a change, and improve your life!

Don’t settle for a job or existence where you aren’t appreciated or only make enough to live paycheck to paycheck. This does not mean you should quit your job or current purpose tomorrow. But don’t ever convince yourself you’re your current state is the best it will ever be, everything is temporary. Now is the time to take a risk and define your SELF worth! If you don’t, someone else will. Being confident of your abilities and self-worth takes courage, I say, drink a cup of courage each day and step out of your comfort zone. When you live for yourself and love yourself, you will live a happier, more successful, more fulfilling life!

Quote: “ You are the Universe, but society teaches limitation.” – Billy Finger

Comment and share your next risk and adventure with us below on the blog!

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“America’s Happyologist” Jackie Ruka is a lifestyle expert who founded the Get Happy Zone (www.gethappyzone.com) personal development organization. She is also the author of the soon-to-be-released book, “Get Happy and Create a Kick Butt Life, a Toolbox for Rapidly Activating the Life You Desire.” Contact Jackie and take her Become Fearless Quiz online at www.tinyurl.com/HappinessQuiz.

 

 

Apr
04
2013

We fear the thing we want the most” – Robert Anthony

You know the term you can run but you cannot hide? Well, this may be the case with fear, if you allow it. Which leads to the question what is fear, really? From a clinical psychology perspective; fear is the loss off love or loss of a love object.  Deep down we all have fear in relation to loss and the what if’s , loss is inevitable as we gain something in our life usually something drops off from our life, this is how energy works.  Point is, we all have fear, this is the norm. The majority of us have fear of success. Success could actually cause loss, in our minds. Yet, when you start to truly love and believe in yourself there is no overwhelm or self – doubt. The purpose of walking your path is to learn the lessons along the way, as everything you want is on the other side of your fear.

What is paradoxical about fear is it can leave us in a comfortable space so as not to really face our inner stuff , living a life of complacency. But, you see fear is just a smoke screen for avoiding our authentic self as we are not meant to live a life of complacency. We are meant to live a life of truth.

Often when coaching clients, the question I hear is, who am I meant to be or what is my purpose? My take on this question is stop and  listen to your body and your heart. Moving from a life of existing to a life of living starts by paying attention to  tuning into what your heart and body yearns to do the most of.  An exercise to find your purpose or meaning I have found is visualization. Here is a life enhancement  technique to begin to visualize  your future self through a visualization manner that resembles what the Universe is asking you to evaluate as the NEW future YOU that you have the ability to manifest and watch your life change turn around for the better!

– What does my life FEEL like everyday?

– Where do I spend my time, how do I spend it and who do I envision this with?

– What does my body crave?

– What are the actions I am doing that satisfy what my body and heart desire?

– What brings you closer to your goal?

In a dream I had a few months back, I was feeling a restless and anxious kind of  sleep, with a pull of indecision and fear. The message that came from this dream was when  my father appeared  and simply stated to me, do what makes you happy. Doing what makes you happy is an inside job, it’s about what FEELS good and whole. My advice then is to do what feels good, what inspires you and simply give yourself permission to dream out loud as there is nothing to fear, except fear itself. Life has it’s scary moments as we don’t see what is on the other side and become unsure of how to navigate the unknowns. The test is recognizing your own strength, we are much stronger than we realize. The fear is a mask preventing one self from going outside of the comfort zone. My question to you is, if you don’t take the step outside of your comfort zone where will you be this time next year?

What next step will you take TODAY to step outside of your comfort zone?

Please leave a comment and get in the Zone, we thrive on your contribution with what resonates with you !

To Your Happiness,

Jackie

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“America’s Happyologist” Jackie Ruka is a lifestyle expert and  art therapist, who founded the Get Happy Zone (www.gethappyzone.com) personal development organization. She is also the author of the soon-to-be-released book, “Get Happy and Create a Kick Butt Life, a Toolbox for Rapidly Activating the Life You Desire.” Contact Jackie for a free  30  minute strategizing session, change your life for the better! CONTACT NOW.

 

 

Mar
03
2013

When you dare, you are courageous and bold enough to try something new. The good news is, you have nothing to lose when trying a new endeavor, the bad news is, many don’t and often sit on the edge of fear rather than faith. This is my way of poking you to dare to be the You that has been aching to express yourself and create a new life. Guess what? I have done this at least three different times and I am doing it again, taking leaps of faith and swallowing cups of courage to create a life that I was meant to live! If I can do it, so can you?

Often I have to stop asking myself what is holding me back and just do what feels right in my heart. Listening, visualizing and being in the moment is often where my happiness is just hanging out, wondering where I have been and why I have not tapped into my well of happiness. Perhaps you may be doing the analysis paralysis, just as I, when change is brewing and you cautiously hang on the sidelines. I call this being a fencesitter to your life. Well, it’s time to get off the fence and begin to renew! The time is NOW  to open up our well of happiness.

The more happiness we spread the sooner our world can be happier. The premise behind this is simple, science has shown that we are happier when we share happiness with another. Simply, put when you smile at another, in most cases he/she smiles back. Smiling is one of the best cures to making another feel good.

Creating a new life, is an inside job with lots of help by others who believe in you and see you as successful already! We all need a little help along the way and I am one of those people who believes we can live our dreams out loud, one step at a time.

And remember, succes does not lead to happiness, it is our happiness that leads to success!

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“America’s Happyologist” Jackie Ruka is a lifestyle/brand expert who founded the Get Happy Zone (www.gethappyzone.com) personal development organization. She is also the author of the soon-to-be-released book, “Get Happy and Create a Kick Butt Life, a Toolbox for Rapidly Activating the Life You Desire.” Contact Jackie for a free  30  minute strategizing session, change your life for the better! CONTACT NOW.

 

Nov
11
2012

Imagine Your Future: 3 Key Strategies

Today is a NEW day! Each and every day we must practice the thought process that the best is yet to come and recognize that we live in miracles. Despair is symbolized by occurrence, how we react  is based upon your spirit. Human spirit is the most powerful of energies. When you have an uplifting spirit, it brings forth a greater speed of belief in yourself and leaves little room for doubt to enter. Moving with confidence in your life is elementary , yet difficult to acquire and sustain unless you are willing to fight for your freedom, well – being and a bright future.

History was made yet again with the re – election of President Obama. No matter who you voted for, it is our job to act and unite as ONE and be grateful for living in times of peace and not war, love and not hate, abundance and not greed; for the greater good. We may be a rich country, but we are not a healthy one.This is not about blame or leadership, but more of a reflection of ourselves. We are responsible for our own happiness, it is not the job of others, government or external forces, it is a strong belief in self, an inside job. I read the other day that a new idea can change the world, and that new idea could be your idea! Do you have a new idea that you are holding on to? I know I do!

3 Key Strategies to Implement your Future:

1. Listen: Listen to what your heart is telling you, directing you and guiding you. You have an answer within, it’s just a matter of trusting the feeling and determining how to act upon it. It will continue to gnaw at you until you flush out what is calling you. Whatever you are seeking is seeking you.

2. Find a Mentor: There is someone out there who is smarter than you. Sorry, but it’s true and this is a good thing! A mentor can assist with looking at what you may not see and help you acquire a “game plan”. In some cases, your mentor may have experienced similar feelings, a role or place in their life that you are currently experiencing. In addition, expressing your desires, ideas, visions, feelings and thoughts is the healthiest way to reaching clarity. You need to be heard and an outside party is committed to listening and pinpointing a new kind of change that feels right to you.

3. Write it down: While you are brainstorming, it is imperative to write down your vision and an intention in each area of your strategy  so as to reach your next milestone. By doing so, it helps you to clarify what it is you really want!

For example, perhaps you have a great business idea or want to relocate but you don’t know how this looks like for you or where to begin? You could comb the internet for hours and gather as much research and facts as possible. But until you step outside of your self, on a level that is unfamiliar and go beyond the comfort zone and crutch that keeps you in a box,  your old thoughts will resurface . It is usually the freshness and newness in change  that sparks your imagination, this is where you find the golden key to your future.

Ready for a Life Lift? Jackie Ruka’s signature blend of  wisdom and strategies can help you create an authentic, empowered personal and professional life! Learn more.

“America’s Happyologist” Jackie Ruka is a lifestyle expert who founded the Get Happy Zone (www.gethappyzone.com) personal development organization. She is also the author of the soon-to-be-released book, “Get Happy and Create a Kick Butt Life, a Toolbox for Rapidly Activating the Life You Desire.” Contact Jackie and take her Become Fearless Quiz online at www.tinyurl.com/HappinessQuiz.

 


 

 

Oct
10
2012

How to accept what IS, in order to grow is about you being able come to terms with, not only what IS but what can be, a fulfilling life  moving forward.

I had an epiphany this past weekend, right around my birthday. I love how birthdays culminate  years prior, of  lessons and blessings, that add to the wisdom we thought we already knew, huh! Anyway, I digress. My old paradigm was holding onto former ideas and expectations of  how I expected a certain someone to extend a  ” Happy Birthday.”  After all, it is MY day, right? Should’t everyone  drop their lives to send a card, call, text, email or flowers, I should think so! Boy, did my ego deflate when the one special person, who I expected to send me good wishes, not only forget but he sent me a link to wrinkle creme in a random email. I laugh now, but not so funny to my sensitive ego at the time.

One of the major steps to gaining acceptance  is recognizing that it’s what we are hanging on to that stops us from accepting. I was  hanging on to a perception of something or someone in my mind, predominantly boyfriend’s past, to present day. My  illusion of a pedestal of expectations  harbored,  came crashing in and polluted my “happy” day , at least I allowed this to happen. Seems our past comes rushing back and informs us of the unhappy or resentful feelings still lurking in the crevices of our souls. So, why was I hanging on to old memories? They were unhappy and not really serving me, so why I asked myself ? Does one person and what they do define who I am , absolutely NOT! Does one occurrence have to be considered good or bad, can I just be neutral and not judge? Can something be happening in another’s life and I simply do not know about it, or what they might be going through at the time? Can one moment of forgetfulness be the start of  a pattern or perhaps it just IS, a sign of their character. Either way, detoxing my bad feelings and stopping the thought process clarified that it is not about me. What is about me is to always be moving forward and cherishing my own personal desires and goals.

Feeling important and loved by others can feel good , however, accepting and loving myself is much more important and healthy. Expecting others to make me feel good or love me is setting myself up for disappointment.When I fully accept me for me and recognize I AM the STAR of my own life, then what others do, say, or struggle with is no longer a reflection of me, it’s a by product of past thoughts and projections that are sour grapes. Accepting you is a major leap in your growth!

Time to throw out the sour grapes and continue to celebrate life, as any loss you have experienced may be an actual gain. A gain of clarity to move toward your higher self and  remember what to be grateful for. The loss or hurts of the past are stepping stones to your light to shine bright  and celebrate YOU!

Mantra: I am the STAR of my life and create what I desire right now.

Need a Life Lift? Jackie Ruka’s signature blend of advice, wisdom and inspiration can help you create an authentic, empowered life! Learn more.

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“America’s Happyologist” Jackie Ruka is a lifestyle expert and inspiration coach for women who founded the Get Happy Zone (www.gethappyzone.com) personal development organization. She is also the author of the soon-to-be-released book, “Get Happy and Create a Kick Butt Life, a Toolbox for Rapidly Activating the Life You Desire.” Contact Jackie and take her Become Fearless Quiz online at www.tinyurl.com/HappinessQuiz.

 

Oct
10
2012

Imagine your dream as a bowl of paint, let’s name your paint as your “happy” paint. You are the brush that dips into your happy paint and begin to make happy strokes within your current life canvas. The fun part is you get to choose the colors, the content and the direction in which to manifest your dream canvas. It’s ok if you make a few mistakes along the way, that’s how you know you are on the right path to your dream. The magic behind all of this is based on movement. Movement accelerates into steps, steps into leaps and leaps into accomplishments. Remember the things that happen to you do not define who you are. In short, you may feel like a victim but you can be the victor from the situation, as every episode in life has a meaning, in most cases it determines what you don’t want, so you can crystallize what you do want. What we learn from our past evolves us into our future. So are you moving toward your dream?

On the news today I listened to an inspiring story about a supposed washed up golfer who for nearly twenty years was following his passion to be a professional golfer. He started at age 25 and won the Scottish open at age 30, but on the PGA tour he had not won a tournament of the 334 PGA starts. He was out there everyday, pushing himself to be the pro he knew he could be. In the meantime, he was working side jobs to help support his wife and 2 kids and was unable to buy health insurance for his family.  At age 52, he finally decided it was time to give up his dream  and move on. Upon his dismay, all his buddies got together and supported him for one year to follow his dream, they knew he had it in him.  He was given a second chance to pick up the sport again, except this time around he realized he had to do something different  to make his dream a reality. He practiced new mind exercise everyday, hired a new swing coach, got a sports psychologist and changed his exercise routine. He said, ‘ it’s better to be decisive than right.” His attitude of perseverance and strong belief in self  won him the prestigious senior PGA championship. For twenty years Michael Allen went from “Michael Who?” to living his life calling as a big money maker in his dream of playing golf for the first time in his life.

More and more people I am meeting seem to be sharing the birth of their inner passion and taking leaps of faith, everyday. Just yesterday I met with two gorgeous ladies, both have made huge leaps of faith and are happier and more excited about life doing what they love. There is no reason why you can’t do the same? Yes, we all have to make a living, no doubt, and you will as the process is not as difficult as you think. Let’s take a look at how you can make your dream a reality and be the architect of your destiny.

1. Don’t quit your day job yet, work at it but start your passion on the side or weekends, it may take a bit longer but it will be worth it!

2. When you begin your passion, your mind and actions will expand, pretty soon you will be doing your passion!

3. Birth your idea, in some way or form, this could be a book, a workshop, a blog , partnering with an entity , all of these facets are areas that will begin the launch of your dream.

4. Everything you have learned up to this point has prepared you, even if you think your not ready, just start. There is a learning curve in anything new, but once your learning your growing and this is part of living the dream.

5. The fear that is in your way is just a mirror of our own self- doubt. Fear is like worry, a waste of time. Stop entertaining your  power on fear and start using your  power by taking a cup of courage and having a little fun dabbling in your dream and painting with your happy paint.

The sooner you start taking leaps of faith, the better you will feel. When you feel good, good things happen! When you think positively, positive things occur. Sometimes, you just have to let it all go, get messy and have some fun with your passion. So, get busy living, life is too short not to and seek a little help from your friends!

Tell us how you started your passion and how it’s going, we want to spread the happiness stroke on the world canvas? Don’t be shy.

If you need help becoming fearless, entertain those inner gems with the Become Fearless Quiz, it’s fun and will help you overcome your personality obstacles.

Become inspired and take a look at the clip about Michael Allen’s Life Calling 

Need a Life Lift? Jackie Ruka’s signature blend of advice, wisdom and inspiration can help you create an authentic, empowered life! Learn more.

 

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“America’s Happyologist” Jackie Ruka is a lifestyle expert and inspiration coach for women who founded the Get Happy Zone (www.gethappyzone.com) personal development organization. She is also the author of the soon-to-be-released book, “Get Happy and Create a Kick Butt Life, a Toolbox for Rapidly Activating the Life You Desire.” Contact Jackie and take her Become Fearless Quiz online at www.tinyurl.com/HappinessQuiz.

 

 

 

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