Aug
08
2015

How to be healthier and Happier about Finding LoveIn a recent interview I was asked by a dating coach about Love, Health, Happiness and Finding Love again after a breakup or divorce. Love and happiness go hand in hand, take a peek at the love insights:

A common problem my clients seem to face is deep rooted skepticism and bitterness especially those who have been recently rejected, dumped, cheated and abandoned by a spouse or significant other. They reach a point where they are either burned out or they have completely lost faith that they can ever find the right man or woman and be happy. How can people overcome this negativity and skepticism and cultivate a positive outlook and be hopeful?

If you want to find love in a healthier and happier manner, you must be what you want to attract. Be the change that you seek.

Yes, it is common to feel skepticism about people who disappoint you, know you are not alone in feeling this way. As you navigate the healing process we are often left with unanswered questions, the why’s, the how come’s, the what did I do or say?

I am here to tell you, that you are ENOUGH! And a man/woman certainly does not define you. However, when things don’t work out with someone whether it’s to do with love or any other kind of relationship it usually represents a lack of an agreement(s). Most of us who are not clearly communicating and forming agreements with each other, where both are on the same page, both will have different expectations. Expectations often lead to disappointment. So think about those love relationships and put yourself in the other person’s shoes for a minute, do you recall a conversation about exclusivity with each other, or the word commitment or loyalty? Now, whether he or she shared these words with you or not, what did their actions portray?

If a person does not follow his/her words with actions or simply the actions tell you how they want to be with you, than there is a lack of integrity or incongruence taking place. This may not have to do with you at all, in other words, if a person cannot be honest with themselves, how can they be honest with you? So let’s go a step deeper, what is it about yourself that you are not being honest about? The more you become honest about yourself the more you will recognize and attract a healthy person who also loves them self. Until you are honest about feelings about YOU, you will continue to mirror yourself in another and repeat toxic feel good patterns.

To become happier and healthier start loving yourself more and stop seeking confirmation from external entities. Happiness is an inside job, take some time out for you and enjoy your life and do what you love to do. In most cases, you will meet the right person who loves to do similar things that you do! Be kind to yourself and choose someone who is kind to you, by doing so you must be BELIEVE you deserve happiness, you deserve love and you can start to receive this in return. But you must be open to receive. Start with a new mantra, I believe and I receive mantra ” I believe I am good and I am open to receive all that is good.” A mantra supplies positive energy all day long. The more you think and utilize your new mantra the sooner your life will change because all that occurs is how you respond to it. Change your response, change your attitude about it and recognize there is something far better awaiting for you.

Lastly, it is ok to feel sad, disappointed, anger, we must embrace our feelings in order to understand what happiness is for you. Feel your feelings and know that all feelings are fleeting. Ponder, contemplate, express those feelings in a healthy manner, as this leads you one step closer to a happier you!

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America’s Happyologist, Jackie Ruka, is a transformational leadership mentor for professionals who crave freedom and are ready to discover living life on their terms!  Her mission is to provide a conscious community of inspiration and cooperation where all flourish based on what makes your soul happy. Her mindshifts and techniques are shared in her best selling book “Get Happy and Create a Kick-Butt Life” ! You can learn more about Jackie and what she has to offer by visiting her Facebook page, Twitter or engage in a complimentary discovery session to learn the step by step process for more direction and happiness in your life. book now.

 

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